Random notes to self

• Life has a tendency of being far too real sometimes. Booze and movies help.
• Thinking about things makes things worse, stop it.
• Shit happens. Deal with it.
• Always trust your gut, 99.5% of the time its right.
• Boys are ridiculous. All of them.
• Consider buying that cat.  
• Talenti Gelato is your new best friend.
• Deadlines can suck it.
• Be productive on your days off.
• Dexter is god.
• Burritos the size of your face make life better.

The Descendants

I went to the movies by myself today. I saw The Descendants and I cried my little eyes out. This is my life.

Meant to be.

letmejusttellyou replied to your photo: GPOY I Look LIke Shit Edition I’ve been up since…

where the vodka at?

That’s exactly what I want to know. At a time like this, when I am was a nervous wreck and tired as fuck … WHERE IS THE FUCKING VODKA? WHERE?!

I need you in my life, mofo. Right now.

Let’s be ballahs

In the game of life, I think I’ve just lost a turn AND taken 4 steps back.

W T F.
First things first, office politics are a motherfucking pain in the ass. I hate having to deal with that kind of bullshit and at this juncture in my ‘career’ I’m not even up to fake dealing with that shit anymore. But guess what, I have to.
Now, I’m not even going to go into specifics because as it is, I’m just about ready to take out a bitch or three. I just need to rant. Vaguely.
So, here’s the deal, things at this place happen in cycles. First, things are okay, then they start to get kinda off, soon after, shit hits the fan and just when you think that things cant possibly get worse, they fucking do. After aaaaaaaaall the crap, when things finally seem to start getting back on track for a bit, we go back to things getting off. Yeah, I don’t know why, but that’s just the way things are at this place. Believe me, it’s quite awful and unfortunately for me, I’ve been around long enough to experience 4 of these cycles. So guess what? Right now we are at things getting off.
Because things have and haven’t been said and because my boss and I have our differences, I am once again at the shit end of yet another cycle.
The difference this time around is that now I’m just too tired to even argue about it. Yeah, of course there’s things that bother me but I’ve reached a point in which I have no desire to get into it or fight for my right (to party? No, not that) to certain things. Certain things that I am owed and certain things that I know pretty fucking damn well, I’ve busted my big, round ass for. You can basically say that I’ve given up. Kinda pathetic, I know. But fuck that shit.
So where does that leave me? In a lose-lose situation. In this game, at this time, I am last place for sure. Not because I’m not doing a good job (you best believe that I give 120% more than what is asked of me) but because I am jaded. I’ve heard this ‘change will be good’ story so many goddamn times and frankly, this time around, I’m just not buying it. This ‘change’ that is being thrown around is only going to benefit a handful of people and I, of course, am not in that handful.

‘So, Tanya, why don’t you just look for another job?’
You know, fuckers, it’s really not that easy. Editorial design is on the verge of extinction and its a goddamn scary fact. I refuse to go work at the mall when I’ve devoted 4 years of my life learning so much in this fucking field.
(… Ahahahaha watch me quit and go work at the fucking Hot Topic in 2 months. — Please shoot me if I do.)
Well, I think I’ve rambled, not quite enough but maybe enough to get me through the night. I needed to evacuate my brain before I hit the sack, otherwise I’d just be tossing and turning all night. Errr … whatever’s left of it.
For now, I’m going to bed, slightly less bitter but oh so very tired. Please don’t let my poor decisions in the game of life change your perspective of this blag. Sometimes I just need to throw words onto the screen rather than keep them in my head. Funner, better stuff to follow soon.
Remember kids, its Friday and for many of you its payday and a night to go out and get plastered. Have fun, be safe and eat lots of peeps. (The green ones are the best.)
Luv and mixed emotions hugs,
me.